Untitled
by Chamofleur
Summary: MOTHER3. Because when you gotta go, you gotta go. Oneshot, light LucasxKumatora.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own MOTHER3, or any other part of the MOTHER series.

Author's Note: Hello, and welcome to my MOTHER3 oneshot-thing! Before you read, I'd like to clear up a few story-related things…First of all, I gave Lucas a stuttering problem, but I sort of did that for a reason: I was told that if you have like…a stutter or speech impediment or something, then it can sometimes indicate trauma and/or self-hatred in that person's past. Knowing Lucas, I thought it'd fit in kind of well, so that's why he has one.

Second thing! Kind of minor, but this takes place in Chapter 7 a few days after the party's re-united from the events of the previous chapter. Aaaand…the third thing would be the Saturn Table. I'm pretty sure it can only fit 3 people in-game, but in this case, I made it so the whole party could scrunch up on it. Sorry if any of these things bother you. D:

But, um…without further ado, here's the story! I do hope you enjoy it. :D

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It didn't take long before Princess Kumatora knew something was wrong with Lucas.

For the past ten minutes riding the Saturn Table, he hadn't been just sitting. He moved his head from side to side as though he were the pendulum on a clock, or rolled around in a fetal position while, to Kumatora's surprise, staying on the fast-moving table. He even did something that looked like break dancing. All Kumatora could do was give the naïve little boy strange glares when the two made eye contact and hope and pray he'd stop.

But, of course, he didn't, which made the Princess very unhappy. She whispered into the ear of her companion and Lucas's family friend, Duster, and asked only one thing:

"What is _wrong_ with that kid?!"

"I'm actually not sure," began Duster as the Saturn Table made its way out of a tunnel and back onto the road, "Do you think we should ask?"

"Of course! Isn't it driving you insane?" She'd returned in a bit of a louder tone, her eyes widening with rage. In front of Duster, Lucas's dog, Boney, took a quick glance at her as if to say, _"Is there something the matter?" _But _Boney_, of all…dogs, wasn't really one to keep a secret. Kumatora knew if she told the dog, he'd do as a pet would and let his master know. So she just simply shook her head to the dog until Duster replied.

"Well, not really, but if you want to ask--"

Although to the surprise of the two, they didn't even have to ask. They felt the bumps and feel of being off-course of the road by Lucas's command, and, looking straight ahead, the group saw a medium-sized one floor building standing by. Kumatora and Duster squinted their eyes to make out what it was, and everything began to make sense as they did. Near that building, the dancing boy Lucas turned to the others behind him, asking nervously:

"Um…I-is it okay if I go to the bathroom?"

And everyone behind him nodded, even Boney.

Parking the Saturn Table a few yards away from the oddly-placed bathrooms and stepping off, Lucas began to sprint to the boys' room, with Boney following as fast as those furry little legs would take him. Kumatora and Duster, on the other hand, just nonchalantly walked towards the building as if it weren't really any big deal.

Or, at least, it wasn't until Lucas saw a line for the boys' room. From a distance, both the thief and the princess noticed something wrong when Lucas started dancing some crazy little dance again, his feet going up and down as though he were jogging in place. Kumatora's walk turned into a bit of a run when she saw this, asking the boy what was wrong.

"Th-there's someone in there, I think…I can't go if--"

"Of course you can! Just be aggressive!" the princess told him. The answering look on Lucas's face was a puzzled one.

"You know…Be assertive!"

Still nothing.

"O-kay…So you're telling me you don't know how to just ask the guy in there to get out so you can go?"

"Well, n-no, not really," the boy began as his usual stammer became worse, "T-there never used to be a line at the bathroom at home. A-and also…I-I've never really used a p-public restroom alone before…"

"Then this'll be your first time alone!" the princess cheered.

"Huh…? C-can't Duster go with me?" Lucas asked, now pointing to Duster. He was sitting on a nearby wooden bench now by Boney, legs crossed, reading one of those thief catalogs he'd stolen from his father. And something was wrong with Lucas again, Kumatora knew. Lucas was a bit—no, _way_ too wimpy for a thirteen-year-old, despite everything he'd been through. _So, _the princess thought, _it'll just be a bit harder to teach him, is all. _

"…No. Duster's got better stuff to do than to watch you pee. _Right_, Duster?" Osohe's princess called out, her gaze aiming right at Duster like a cannon about to shoot, saying: _If you don't nod, I swear, I'll--_

But she didn't have to continue; Duster nodded, as multi-tasked as it was.

"B-but I really have to--"

"Look, I'm going to teach you how to not be all shy so you can go in that bathroom and not be scared. Okay?"

"What?" Lucas asked, tilting his head and dancing still at the same time.

"…Just say 'okay'."

"Um, okay."

"All right, good!" Kumatora grinned almost sarcastically while she said this, "Now, for example, since no one's in the women's room, I'll show you what you should do in case you really gotta go. Okay?"

"Okay," the boy nodded. And, just as she said, the princess was as Kumatora as she could be at that moment, knocking rather rudely on the door with clenched, oven-mitt-armed fists. The princess began to complain to the door as though it were a real person.

"All right, look, lady," Kumatora began, yelling her heart out, "I don't _care_ if you've been holding whatever you've got in there for three weeks, _**I gotta go**!_ Now get your butt outta the bathroom before I have to burn the door down!"

The look on Lucas's face was that of a Reconstructed Caribou in front of headlights: scared to death….well, maybe. He could have gone right there where he stood in pure fear, but even though he was scared, he, with the little amount of bravery he had at the time, held it all in.

"So do you get it now, Lucas? You just have to yell! Just think of something that makes you really mad and yell at the do--"

Kumatora couldn't finish, as a very heavyset woman with a large, black dress slammed the bathroom door open, throwing the princess into the building's brick wall. The woman yelled at almost the same volume as Kumatora, right in her face.

"Can't you people be _patient?_ I swear, that's the most selfish thing to do, throwing a person out of a bathroom!"

And then she left, her face as bright red as the stripes on Lucas's shirt. The look on Kumatora's face was the same as Lucas's was now, and it wasn't changing.

"Um…Princess Kuma?" Lucas asked, tapping the redhead rather quickly on the shoulder due to his dancing, "A-are you okay?"

"O-oh, yeah! I'm…just…fine," was all Kumatora could say through clenched teeth.

"That's good to hear…um…Should I try it now?"

"Sure; I guess you can practice on this bathroom now since it's actually…empty…this time."

Obviously, Lucas knew that Kumatora was still in complete shock, but he began to try to remember what she did to get the unknown lady out of there. Trying to think back and remember as much as he could, the timid boy sheepishly knocked on the door, saying whatever he could remember from his friend's speech.

"Um…I don't really think you've been h-holding it in for t-three weeks, m-mister. It's just…I-I really need to g-go, so…" He trailed off, stuttering even more from the fact that he really, _really_ had to go. Kumatora was beginning to get a little frustrated at Lucas. Did he _really_ have no dignity at all?

"C'mon, Lucas, you can do better than that!"

"But I tried my best and I r-really have to go, Princess Kuma! Please!"

"Please what?" the redhead asked.

"P-please, just…l-let me use the women's room; there's a line at the m-men's room and I really, _really, realllllly_ need to go!"

"Do you really think I'd let you lose all your pride by going in there, Lucas? No. I wouldn't," at this time, Kumatora's voice was raised a bit from frustration, grabbing the attention of some bathroom-goers and the hot-dog seller that stood near the bathrooms, "It's either the men's room, or you go pee in some bush. What's it gonna be?"

"Aw…okay, I'll t-try…"

"Good!" the princess chirped, "Now, this time, I want you to think of something that makes you really mad, like cabbages."

"…Cabbages, Princess Kuma?"

"Of course cabbages! Why_ not_ cabbages?"

"Well," Lucas tried to agree, now beginning to sweat and looking like he was going to have to dance a tango with Kumatora, "I guess they are p-pretty…um…c-cabbage-y."

"_Exactly! _Now, care to give it a try?"

"O-okay…" the timid boy hesitated, but walked up to the bathroom door once more, trying to think of something, _anything_ that made him mad.

And then he saw that picture in his mind. The one of the Masked Boy, staring him down after the escape from the Lightning Tower.

He didn't quite know why, but the first time he saw that boy, something in his heart made him feel so angry, yet so sad at the same time. He wanted to scream at that boy and attack him, but something else made himself want to hug and cry to this boy that he thought he didn't even know.

At this ponit, Lucas hammered his fists on the door as though they were hundred-pound weights, his legs still shivering from everything he held in, both physically and mentally. Kumatora's expression was a shocked one, similar to how she reacted when she found out there was actually someone in the women's room.

"O-Open the door! Please! Just…just let me go! Let me go! I can't…I can't hold it any longer!"

And then, reasons unknown to Kumatora, tears began to roll down his cheeks.

"Whoa, whoa, Lucas! T-Too much! Tone it down!" She yelled at the crying boy; a large crowd began to circle around the two, Duster and Boney included. When hearing the princess's words, Lucas immediately stopped what he was doing, staring Kumatora right in the eye with cobalt eyes of sadness.

"A-ah…Sorry…" the timid boy replied, his thoughts of the masked boy fading for now. The crowd that had gathered around him had begun to dissipate, he was glad for that, but the long line to the men's room still remained, and his dancing still continued.

"It's all right, Lucas…Just don't be such a spaz, okay?" the princess chuckled, embracing her friend in a hug as she did so. And to Kumatora's surprise in that moment, Lucas's dancing stopped. He returned the hug, and for a second, he couldn't feel a thing except warmth in his heart.

For at that moment, she had reminded him of his mother.

As Kumatora let go, Lucas smiled at the princess, blushing a little, despite the fact that he started to do the Macarena like a crazy person. All the princess could do was laugh at the boy, but give him a smile nonetheless.

"So, then, you ready to try again?" she asked. At that, Lucas's eyes widened, almost wide enough for his eyeballs to come out of their sockets. This is all he had to say:

**"PK Flash!"**

And then everything went dark for Kumatora.

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"Ugh…" the princess muttered; it was all she could say at the time through closed eyes. The sound of conversation wrapped around her ears, getting louder and louder as she slowly regained consciousness on the dirt ground.

Opening her eyes slowly, two blurry figures came into her view: One was a big hairy brown one that panted and left a rather odd stench of a Putrid Moldyman as it breathed out, while the other was a large-headed one wearing blue with a small, yet fairly noticeable moustache.

"Duster…Boney?" she asked as the figures turned back to normal from their blurs, "What happened?"

"Lucas threw a PK Flash at you and then ran for his life to go to the bathroom," Duster said.

"(I've actually never seen him run this fast before…)" Boney added.

"He did it!" Kumatora yelled as she stood up from the dirt ground, brushing herself off, "He actually went by himself! Oh, I'm so--"

"He wasn't headed for those bathrooms, though," Duster began, "He went to that bush. Wayyyyy over there." The thief pointed to a small green bush, about thirty yards away, and sure enough, Lucas was on his way back from there, walking casually without a dance move in sight. Making his way towards the party, he smiled and waved, saying:

"So, l-let's get back to finding those needles!"

Kumatora twitched. She was both amazed and completely furious.

"Lucas?" she asked through clenched teeth.

"Y-Yes, Princess Kuma?"

"…Remind me to kill you later."

"O-oh…uh, okay…"

"You're such a girl," she added, and left it at that.

From there, the two could say no more about that incident. Silently, the four heroes loaded themselves onto their Saturn Table and began heading for their next destination, wherever that may have been.

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And that's pretty much it, I guess! Sorry if the characters were a little OOC…For me, it's really hard trying to actually get someone's character down when you read through a game with a translation guide. I have no idea why. On another note relating to character, Lucas may have seemed a tiny bit girly (Even Kumatora mentioned it!)…That's because I got most of my inspiration for Lucas's character by pictures of him that my friend drew in her blog…They were all so cute and innocent looking that I wanted to base his character on the awesome pictures that she drew…So if you were wondering at all, that's the reason. :P

But, um…If you liked the story, or have some advice for the next time I write, I would be eternally grateful to hear it, as long as it's not too harsh. I'm all wimpy. XD

Also! Big thanks to my sister Mango (Moonside Mango on the Starmen forums) for beta-reading this. We love you, Mango!


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